Blog
A year ago, I stepped away from a great job at a great company, with almost no notice and no other full-time employment lined up. I was doing complex, lucrative work with cool clients and a super supportive employer. So what happened? Answer #1: I’d been preparing to go full-time solopreneur for a while, and […]
“Make a different mistake.” This has been my mantra through dozens of critical decisions and moments of uncertainty over the last couple of years. Trusting myself hasn’t come easily. Years of gaslighting and unwinnable situations scrambled my signals and created paralyzing doubt around my choices. Reaching some mystical moment of perfect clarity was, most of […]
Something really powerful just happened. Like so many of us, I have struggled mightily with shame, self loathing, and a sense of brokenness. We all have different “parts” or facets of our personality that try to protect us from encountering those painful emotions in different ways. (The more trauma you’ve experienced, the more disjointed these […]
I spent last weekend in a house with eight other women, celebrating a friend’s wedding. This kind of thing, in the past, would’ve left me drained, overwhelmed, and inevitably sick. (I am an introvert’s introvert, and get easily overstimulated – to the point I used to beg my parents to let me skip my friends’ […]
Confrontation is the worst. Who’s with me? If I had a nickel for every difficult personal conversation I’ve avoided, I’d have *almost* enough nickels to fund all the therapy that not-having-the-difficult-conversations necessitates. On the plus side, the sheer terror of initiating confrontation led me to spend an inordinate amount of time figuring out how to […]
I like to think I’m decent at integrating difficult feedback from other people. (That comes easily when you’re your own harshest critic, and constantly assume you’re in the wrong.) What’s more challenging, I’ve found, is taking feedback from myself. Signals from my body and my emotions are things I long tried to suppress, deny, and […]
I’m on a secret mission: to make my clients cry. (In a good way.) Crying is a sign pointing to what we really care about. It’s a release valve. It’s a pattern disruptor. It means we’ve touched something deep and meaningful. It means we’re stepping out of the antiseptic, perfectly curated persona we hide behind […]
How do you recognize you have been triggered and stop the spin, before you react in a way you’ll regret? I’ve shared my own real-time process for working through the feelings that come up in the aftermath of a triggering situation. But before any of that happens, there’s a prerequisite step: recognizing that something big […]
The recent news about overturning Roe v. Wade really triggered me. My nervous system dysregulated: I couldn’t focus, I felt outside of myself, everything started to look bleak, and I felt personally attacked in a very visceral way that went deeper than I could articulate. I want to be effective and useful in advancing the […]
