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This is the final installment of our series on the most common “cognitive distortions,” or thinking errors. Cognitive distortion #9 is… Disqualifying the positive What it is: “Disqualifying the positive” is a cognitive distortion that involves downplaying or dismissing positive experiences, achievements, or feedback while focusing solely on the negative aspects of a situation. It’s almost as […]
Today we’re on to part 8 of our series on the most common “cognitive distortions,” or thinking errors. This is the second-to-last installment before we wrap up this series. Cognitive distortion #8 is… “Should” statements What it is: At its core, the “should statements” cognitive distortion revolves around rigid expectations and self-imposed standards we place […]
Today we’re on to part 7 of our series on the most common “cognitive distortions,” or thinking errors. Cognitive distortion #7 is… Personalization What it is: Personalization is a cognitive distortion that involves taking things personally, even when they have nothing to do with you. It assumes that everything others say or do is a […]
Today we’re on to the next part of our series on the most common “cognitive distortions,” or thinking errors. I’m bundling two distortions together this time, because they’re opposite sides of the same coin: The “fallacy of change” and the “fallacy of control.” What they are: The fallacy of change involves the belief that external circumstances or […]
Today we’re on to part 4 of our series on the most common “cognitive distortions,” or thinking errors. Cognitive distortion #4 is… All-or-nothing thinking What it is: All-or-nothing thinking, also known as black-and-white thinking, involves seeing things in extremes with no middle ground. This type of thinking can lead to rigid and inflexible beliefs and […]
Today we’re on to part 3 of our series on the most common “cognitive distortions,” or thinking errors. Cognitive distortion #3 is… Magical thinking.. What it is: Overall, “magical thinking” refers to attempts to control external outcomes via thoughts or rituals that clearly don’t have the power to actually affect the outcome. Sounds silly, but […]
The coolest thing about coaching, that nobody else is talking about: Nervous system regulation is contagious. That means you can learn to modulate your stress response, in part, just by being around someone who already knows how to do it. Allow me to explain: Ever worked with a neurotic boss who panics easily? Or spent […]
Your “explanatory style” – whether you view events through an optimistic or pessimistic lens – has major impacts on your health, happiness, and performance: Do you know what your explanatory style is, and how to leverage its power? “Explanatory style” is the way we explain to ourselves WHY a certain outcome occurred. It shapes the […]
Self-criticism is my native tongue. It was the default language of my brain. The grammar and syntax of self-criticism comes to me effortlessly, with scathingly precise vocabulary. The notion of being gentler with myself just didn’t compute for the longest time. I knew it was something I should do, but it was like being asked […]
An uncomfortable truth about those New Year’s Resolutions: We don’t change until the actual pain of not changing exceeds the perceived pain of trying something different. The paradoxical good news, once we make it over that high change-aversion threshold, is: The bigger the pain, the bigger the turnaround. That’s why I’m deeply grateful that shit […]
